Yesterday we offered up our four best runners-up for the top five countdown of Donald Trump’s best (from the right) or worst (from the left) nicknames on his road to, and now, as President of the United States. In the era of “play nice in the sandbox” The Donald never shies away from a good jab or a right (saw what we did there?) cross.
Today, below, are our top five in ascending order of punch strength.
5. Low Energy Jeb Bush– The Republican old guard and its committee for election in 2016 mostly had aligned its effort and huge money behind the brother of one and the son of another former president. Hey everyone, get excited about another Bush! The problem was twofold. One, America was screaming for less of the same and wanted a fresh feel. Two, Jeb’s a nice guy, but Jeb doesn’t exactly energize. Then candidate Trump sensed all of the above and labeled him Low Energy Jeb. Republican’s from near and far collectively agreed that Jeb didn’t exactly light up a room. Soon, he wasn’t any longer in the room. It was a Trump TKO.
4. Pencil Neck Adam Schiff– The newest nickname is only a week old. It makes its debut at number 4. We were quite tempted to place it higher, much higher. It was the impetus for this post actually. It’s not higher because of the significance of the remaining three, but like a fine wine (or whine if you are Schiff) it will only gain more character with age. Schiff, Chair of the Intelligence Committee, has put himself on the front burner as one of Trump’s biggest critics. When one sticks his (pencil) neck out attacking President Trump one might get burned. No further explanation is needed. It’s as if a flyweight stepped into the wrong ring.
3. Crooked Hillary– As Secretary of State under President Obama, Hillary Rodham Clinton had a small problem with too many phones in hand, and way too many emails erased. After Trump stumped his way past Lil Marco, Lyin Ted, and Low Energy Jeb, he focused his energy on the highest office in the land. Clinton’s Bengazi problem and use of personal technology while conducting official and perhaps top-secret US business was under investigation. Trump decided that she was guilty, naming her Crooked Hillary. America, almost silently it seemed, had grown tired of the same old, same old Washington mess. Jeb Bush had no energy and the wrong last name. Hillary was labeled crooked and had the wrong last name. Drain the swamp Trump said. He hit her right on the nose.
2. Pocahontas- Like Pencil Neck Adam, we were tempted to put this one higher, meaning number one. It easily could be. Elizabeth Warren, senior Senator from Massachusetts, claimed many times in her past that she was of Native American heritage. She did so repeatedly on college entrance applications and law bar applications alike. Being a minority helps in such pursuits. As she rose in recognition and importance the lie, exaggeration, or stretch (however you wish to look at it) grew in stature. Her outspoken opposition of The Donald caused him to drop the name Pocahontas on her. Politically incorrect, said many. Racist said many more. But, now Warren has had to say she was sorry about that more and more. With a one word nickname Warren, now an announced presidential candidate for 2020, has a handle that she will struggle to shake. It’s a shot to the body by The Donald that takes the wind away.
1. Rocket Man– A ripple of shock rolled through Twitter and the global media when President Trump called North Korea’s Kim Jong Un “Rocket Man” on the floor of the United Nations. How dare he inflame an already very strained relationship with a dictator who sent a few nuclear test missiles over South Korea and Japan? Heck, we even heard that North Korea’s capability had reached a range that could target the left coast of America. Undeterred, on a world stage, Trump pressed on. Perhaps he knows when he has the better cards? Two years and two summits later Rocket Man has not yet been completely neutered, but the rockets haven’t glared red in a long while. And, Trump and team continues to press hard for complete disarmament. Given what was and is at stake on a global stage, this nickname is the knockout.
It’s only a matter of time before Trump recognizes another exposed chin and takes a swing. The BBR money is on Joe Biden. With accusers aplenty, Biden might wear himself out before he ever gets into the ring. Trump is just bidding his time before he jabs.
Say it ain’t so, Joe.